Review: Assassin’s Creed

January 15, 2009 at 12:52 am | In Games, Reviews | Leave a Comment
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After several days of intensive gaming, including one day of shifting between me and a mate, I have at long last finished Assassin’s Creed. I haven’t played many (any?) Ubisoft games before, including the notable Prince of Persia games, so I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I can safely say now that all the PoP games are now on my list.

My first impression of the game wasn’t great. In retrospect, I can’t imagine why, but at the time, I wasn’t really drawn into it. But, I pressed on, and very quickly, the game consumed me.

Most importantly of all, the game is fun. They’ve created an excellent world, and moving around in it is exhilarating. I spent hours just running and jumping from roof to roof, and climbing up every tall building I could find. It feels incredibly natural, too. Seriously, dude is a ninja. Not just a ninja. A monkey ninja.

Combat, I know, is a big sore point for a lot of people in this game. I want to come right out and say that I enjoyed it. A lot. It wasn’t perfect; not by design, but by unfortunate unresponsiveness. I wouldn’t change anything about their combat system, but I would like it to work a little better. But it’s very rare that a game can pit one person against anywhere between one and seven (the most I ever fought at one time, though there were as many as twenty others waiting to jump in) enemies and still make you feel like you’re in control. Instead of being overwhelming, it’s very easy to manage, and combat flows smoothly, when the system works. As the game progresses, enemies get smarter instead of tougher, by using new tactics and responding more intelligently. It’s a much more refined system than enemies simply gaining more health and doing more damage. It was very satisfying to pull of my first successful counter, which resulted in my dodging the enemy’s blow, slicing through his kneecap then stabbing him through the chest. Awesome. Also, the variety of weapons were excellently chosen and implemented. My main concern with it is that the gameplay through the middle of the game is fairly repetitive, and your investigations for assassinations are very formula based. New city, climb high to get a good view, then find bitches to interrogate, pickpocket or eavesdrop on. Also sometimes there are informants, who’ll give you information if you collect flags or kill people stealthily for them. They feel like the least organic but most rewarding sources.

The story was definitely a high point for me, though I didn’t think it would be at first. Mostly because it’s actually to concurrently occurring stories, neither of which are particularly compelling at first. The basic plot is as follows: it’s the year 2012, and you’ve been kidnapped by some organisation. This is because your DNA contains the genetic memories of one of your ancestors and hence the location of a valuable treasure. They’ve developed a device which will let you relive those memories, but it’s too unstable to jump to the last memory, so instead, you have to work your way through all of them. The memories are divided into blocks, and as you progress through them, the real world story progresses too.

It’s a very clean and fairly original idea, and one they’ve implemented well. More importantly, though is how it ties in with and effects the gameplay (they also do an excellent job of this). As you’re reliving a memory, obviously it would be possible to stray from that. The game handles this in a few ways. Instead of a health bar, you have a sync bar. If you get completely desynchronised, you die, and have to start from the last checkpoint. If you get hurt, or do something your ancestor wouldn’t do (like kill an innocent civilian for example) it goes down. If you do the things he did, like climbing view points, it goes back up. It also comes back over time. Slowly.

Another important issue with this is the idea of failing something. For example, you want to pickpocket some guy, but he catches you. Obviously, it’s a game, and you need a way to redo it. But most games don’t cover it very well (there aren’t many organic ways of handling it, really, unless you introduce a spontaneous amnesia virus or something). Assassin’s Creed divides it into a memory pattern. If you fail, that little part of the memory re-loads itself, and the rest of the world stays in tact. It makes sense, and it works, something a lot of games don’t bother with, or else fail miserably.

Another highlight of the game for me was the dialogue. It was well written, and competently acted. Most of it was intriguing, though like any movie or novel, some of it was weaker than other parts. More interesting for me, though, was the (possibly unintentional) social commentary that emerged from some of it. For example, if you jump of a roof and land in the street, obviously, people are going to react. Same if you just randomly start climbing a building. Some responses to this include “He’s going to hurt himself, and I won’t help him”, “When will he stop acting like a child” and “Why is he being such a fool”. As I’ve mentioned previously, I think it’s a serious concern that people will do away with harmless actions as being childish, or foolish. I found it interesting that it would feature in this game (and since I did a lot of wall climbing, I heard it a lot). Weird.

An interesting point is the game’s cultural sensitivity. It’s set in 1191 in the ‘Holy Land’ including Jerusalem, Acre and Damascus. Templar Knights, Saracens, King Richard, all of these feature in the game (the last is only mentioned, I think, but still). There is a religious war going on, and in today’s climate, that’s ballsy territory. A lot of media today shies away from that kind of content. Granted, it’s in the past, but they still thought it was big enough to warrant a disclaimer at the start stating the game was developed by a multicultural team from a plethora of faiths. They didn’t seem to receive a lot of backlash over it either, which pleases me. Mostly, I’m glad to see that not everyone is terrified to include Muslims in their work. It also features as an interesting piece of history, though the further it goes on, the more they bend the truth, but it’s all in the name of the story they’ve concocted (you even have a conversation with your captor/scientist dude) about how it’s starting to be a little different to how you were taught.

Last of all, the game ends with a slight twist and a massive cliffhanger, so now I’m all fired up for the next one, which may be released in 2010. Great. Overall, I was very impressed by Assassin’s Creed, and I’d heartily recommend it. The mid-game is repetitive, but I found that the gameplay was still interesting enough to make me keep playing it, even if I did have to break it up over several days. Also, the end game is totally worth it story wise, but not so great gameplay wise. In every category, this game scores high with me. Of course, I don’t believe in actual scores (you may have noticed I’ve stopped actually grading things) but if I did, this would get some high numbers.

Review: Madagascar 2: Escape 2 Africa

January 1, 2009 at 10:10 pm | In Movies, Rants, Reviews | 2 Comments
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Why do people feel the need to replace to/too with the number 2? Oh, fucking wow, they’re phonetically identical. You’re really shaking things up by switching them around, aren’t you? Do you want a fucking medal? You know, ‘cos you’re so clever? And creative? And original? And not a complete fucking tool at all?

But let’s not judge the movie on its title alone. The rest of the movie… well, let’s just say the title is the best part.

This movie was fucking terrible. So terrible, in fact, I was unable to stay seated the whole time. Partway through, I simply fell out of my chair, such was my unimaginable loathing for this appalling audiovisual nightmare. Now, I have never in my life walked out of a movie, even when it has reached a point where there is no possible way it can be redeemed. Some kind of misplaced loyalty to the industry, I guess. For whatever reason, I have endured every Satanic hellspawn that Hollywood has thrown my way, beginning to end. Had it not been for the company I was in, I would have left this movie.

To begin, the plot was horrific. Gut-wrenchingly painful. They managed to cram in every possible cliche, haphazardly hacked into pieces then slammed together and held in place with tape and loose bits of string. When the climax of the movie came, and I was barely able to recognise it as a climax, due to the pathetic excuse for drama they slapped onto the side of the movie with some blu tac, hoping it would stick, I was overwhelmed by the impossible unoriginality and predictability of it all. I imagine the script outline was written by throwing some half chewed crayons at the retarded infant offspring of incestual mutant fish-men. And no paper.

The dialogue of the movie was probably just a recording of Chris Rock and Ben Stiller when they were high, drunk, on fire and being dangled upside down by a large snake. Only, they then proceeded to cut out anything that could have actually been processed by an audience with a brain, just to ensure that by the end of the movie, everyone’s grey matter has leaked out their ears and onto the seats. Agonizingly forced ‘cool black lingo’, badly mangled character development, re-used (but not improved) jokes from the first movie and generally deplorable B grade comedy screw ups.

The characters, by the way, have actually regressed since the first movie. They are even shallower and less interesting than ever before, and for that, I commend them. If their intent was to create the worst sequel to a bad movie in the history of cinema, they have done a more than impressive job. They are even more annoying and more difficult to relate to than ever before.

The animation has not improved at all, either. All the models for the other animals are pretty much slightly modified versions of the four main characters, with a few extra thrown in for good luck. It would have been impressive, I don’t know, five years ago? Maybe? It certainly isn’t now, and it wasn’t when the original came out.

If you plan on seeing this movie, I would like to offer some more enjoyable alternatives. They are cheaper, and provide roughly the same sensation, only without the inconvenience  of leaving the house.

Have someone beat your head in repeatedly with a shovel. (This is also an excellent remedy in the event that you DO see the movie)

Swallow glass shards or razor blades.

Travel back in time and catch the bubonic plague.

Attempt to peel your skin entirely off your body.

Take a bath in sulphuric acid.

DO NOT SEE THIS FUCKING MOVIE.

Review: Twilight

December 28, 2008 at 8:10 pm | In Books, Movies, Rants, Reviews | 2 Comments
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First of all, I am sick to fucking death of Twilight. Everyone falls into one of two camps: screaming, whining, immature Edward lovers who think that Twilight is the veritable pinnacle of all that is good in the world, and screaming, whining, immature haters who think that it’s the worst thing to happen to literature/movies since anything.

Fuck you both.

Also, to clarify, I am reviewing both the book and movie here. I am aware that they are very separate entities. I hope you are aware that I don’t give a shit.

So, let’s start with the story. It’s a typical teenage romance. Girl meets boy, they fall in love, blah blah blah random challenge, they overcome it and their love is stronger. She spices it up by making one of the protagonists a vampire (though her interpretation on vampires is fairly loose), but it’s in no way original.

The characters are all fairly two dimensional, and the events offer nothing in the way of excitement, tension, or really any form of emotional response.

That’s it. It’s so mediocre that I can’t muster up anything more than that.

The movie is a fairly decent interpretation, the actors all play their parts well, but not perfectly. Does it change anything? Not really.

So, let’s look at the two sides.

Those who love it love it because regardless of their limited personalities, the characters are all very endearing. The book is easy to read (read: simple) and for the most part, enjoyable. The story, whilst rather lacking, is really just a vehicle for the characters to interact in various ways, and to be exposed to the audience. Basically, it’s a fun, teenage romance about vampires.

Those who hate it target the poor writing, story, character development, lack of realism, and basically anything they can sink their teeth into (no pun intended). They criticise the relationship between Edward and Bella as being very sexist, Edward as being controlling, Bella as being submissive, and the way the relationship forms over a very short period of time. They complain about the way that most of the book is dedicated to describing Edward in basically every even vaguely positive description available.

So basically, they’re both right. Yes, those problems all exist. But they can’t ruin the book unless you let them. No, it’s not a literary masterpiece, but it never claims to be. It’s a story that someone decided to write down and publish, and became popular. If you go into the book with a positive attitude, I almost guarantee you’ll enjoy it. There’s also a very good chance that you will find Edward every bit as irresistible as everyone else. If you go into it expecting crap, crap is what you’ll get. And it’ll be your own fault.

So, fuck you to both parties.

Go fuck yourself, anyone who dedicate any amount of time to pointing out all the flaws that everyone already knows. Go burn your eyes out and replace them with hot coals, all you screaming fuckwits who dedicate yourselves to a FUCKING FICTIONAL CHARACTER. Go throw up your own intestines, anyone who thinks Twilight is one of the greatest literary pieces of our day. Go lather yourself in honey and feed yourself to fire ants, anyone who thinks that it’s one of the worst.

In fact, basically anyone can go fuck themselves. I’m sick of Twilight.

Review: Penny Arcade: On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness, Episode 2

December 16, 2008 at 11:44 am | In Games, Reviews | Leave a Comment
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Yeah, I couldn’t wait to get around to part 2. This will be a lot shorter though, because the games look, feel, and play very similarly.

For the most part, Episode 2 improved on Episode 1 in a lot of ways. The story/exploration element was longer and more in depth, which was rewarding. The characters all had new moves and weapons, and a wider variety of enemies meant even the combat didn’t feel like playing the same game again. The story picked up well where Episode 1 left off, and I am definitely looking forward to Episode 3.

Though Episode 1 was fairly straightforward when it came to sticking to the basic formula of the game, Episode 2 deviated from that somewhat, exploring new concepts and ideas. I enjoyed these parts the most, as they really managed to break up the gameplay.

The dialogue was just as good, the cutscenes slightly better, and the sound, much the same. Not much to say on this account, really.

I did notice some more problems, however. In combat, clicking enemies to attack them got rather irritating, as clicking on the enemy itself wouldn’t suffice. Each enemy had a small selection ring beneath it, and you had to click within that ring. That was fine for some of the smaller/thinner enemies, but against larger enemies (especially spiders), it meant a lot of waving the mouse around trying to find exactly where that centre was.

Also, the final boss of the game, though impressive, disappointed me a little. Episode 1’s final boss is a gargantuan statue that you have to destroy in an epic battle. Episode 2, though perhaps visually more impressive, is defeated by a very simple formula, that didn’t leave me with the same feeling of achievement.

A few things added in Episode 2 included a difficulty level (which I immediately set to ‘gentle’ ), the ability to unlock an ‘insane’ difficulty upon beating the game, a few power-up granting outfits, a page to review your statistics, achievements, and of course a new story, areas and enemies.

Definitely an improvement on Episode 1, and I can’t wait for Episode 3.

Review: Penny Arcade: On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness, Episode One

December 15, 2008 at 7:25 pm | In Games, Reviews | 1 Comment
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The first thing I should say about this game, obvious though it may be, is that it is aimed at Penny Arcade fans. If you don’t read Penny Arcade, you’ll miss a lot of the jokes, and some of it won’t make sense. That said, even without that background knowledge, it’s still possible to enjoy the game.

The game’s objective, according to Gabe and Tycho, is to play as an interactive comic experience, and it achieves this aim remarkably well. The story is well written, compelling you to push further into the game, just to find out what happens next. It’s also humorous for the vast majority of the game, from the dialogue to the very foundations of the game (The story revolves around chases a giant robot called Fruit Fucker Prime, a Penny Arcade joke. It’s basically a juicer that ‘fucks’ the fruit to create the juice, only in this, it’s massive). 

So, story wise, I was very impressed. It’s not a full-length game, but it’s not supposed to be, so I can’t fault them on that. The writing is sharp and there were countless moments that had me laughing out loud at the jokes or ridiculous concepts they came up with. Nothing seemed forced or out of place, and they progressed through the story admirably.

Visually, it was hit and miss. The cutscenes were all in 2D, like the comic, and they looked amazing. I never cease to be amazed by Gabe’s artistic talent. The dialogue too was in 2D, and played out very much like a comic, even more so than the cutscenes. The gameplay, though, was in 3D, which disappointed me. I understand it had to be 3D to allow for 3D gameplay, but the art did not translate well to 3D.

There wasn’t a lot of spoken dialogue in the game, but coming from a comic, that’s probably a good thing. One of the things I like most about comics is that I can imagine the voices of the characters, and when they make the jump to animation, like CAD or PVP, I’m always let down by the voices. What dialogue is spoken (The narrator at the start of the game) is brilliantly performed. The rest of the sounds in the game (the soundtrack, sound effects etc) are all enjoyable, but not outstanding.

The gameplay was interesting. It was very simple (click to move, and click on items to interact, click on enemies to fight them) with the games focus being combat and some puzzle solving, both of which were pulled off well. The puzzle solving basically meant a lot of going between different places clicking on different things, then going back to a central point and exploring elsewhere, but the fact that it never felt boring or repetitive is a testament to the game’s strength. It didn’t help that it was quite short, either. The combat involved waiting for abilities to ‘charge’, then using them by clicking on the attack, then clicking on the enemy. Special attacks involved extra challenges (Pressing the right sequence of keys, pressing the space bar enough before the timer ran out etc) and you could time blocks to decrease enemy damage or even earn a counterattack. It wasn’t groundbreaking, but it was solid, and I enjoyed it.

As a game, it wasn’t the best I’ve ever played, but it was an enjoyable experience, and definitely worth the $20 I payed for it. I’d recommend it only to Penny Arcade fans though, if you don’t like their style of humour, you probably won’t like this game. And as an interactive comic experience, as they meant it to be, it was brilliant, and I can’t wait for Episode 2 to finish downloading.

Review: Wicked

November 27, 2008 at 2:30 pm | In Live Shows, Reviews | Leave a Comment
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What I liked:

The story was good. They wrapped it around the Wizard of Oz really well, and managed to make it fresh and interesting. The characters were all well written, and the costumes were fantastic. The cast performed admirably, and the set was creative and worked really well.

What I didn’t:

The songs were, for the most part, boring and bland. None of them drew me in, and some of the chorus songs were hard to understand. The whole thing was painfully predictable. And not in the usual broadway happy ending way, but in a crappier, less fun way. There were a lot of primary school kids there, and I don’t like them.

It was an overall positive experience, but I think the music really let it down. It took me a while to get into it (towards the end of the first half), and even when I got into it, and was really enjoying it, the songs just didn’t click with me. Not that they were bad, they just weren’t great. I really think they could have done far better. It’s definitely worth seeing though, unless you’re not a real person, and haven’t seen The Wizard of Oz. In which case, fuck you.

Review: Quantum of Solace

November 25, 2008 at 4:57 pm | In Movies, Reviews | Leave a Comment
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What. The. Fuck.

I uttered those three words more times than I care to remember during this movie. Completely devoid of anything resembling a plot, dialogue, or character development. It made little to no sense, offered no explanations for anything, and blatantly contradicted itself on more than one occasion.

The movie basically jumps from one action sequence to another, with barely five minutes of… um… something, in between, to attempt to tie them together. Supposedly, these make up the story part of the movie, but in reality, they do little more than confuse you even further, by pretending the movie actually has some sort of substance.

Not that the action sequences weren’t great. For the most part, they were well choreographed, and well performed. They were exciting and a little creative (only a little) and if the movie was sold only on those sequences, it would do fine, and I wouldn’t really have much to complain about.

But, this was a Bond movie, and there are certain expectations of a Bond movie. One of those, of course, is a plot. You need a villain, a crime, and a mystery for Bond to solve. This had only a shadow of that. No gadgets, no Bond chicks, no fancy cars. Really, nothing that makes Bond, Bond, was in this movie.

It felt a lot more like a Bourne movie than a Bond movie. A lot of action, shooting, car chases, shooting, explosions, shooting, and stunts. And shooting. Did I mention that people get shot? Cos they do. A lot.

Daniel Craig is still an excellent Bond. He plays the part brilliantly, and I’m just sorry he had such a terrible script and irritating director to work with. But hopefully the next one will be back to the standards of Casino Royale, or better.

The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor

September 21, 2008 at 7:36 pm | In Movies, Reviews | Leave a Comment
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Oh God, do I wish I was mummified right now. Anything to dull the pain of that dreadful film. It took all my willpower just to remain in the cinema, and to not set fire to the entire complex.

Now, I loved the first two movies. I quite enjoy Brendan Frasier’s acting, most of the time. But this was basically just some people going “hey, let’s make some more money by making another Brendan Frasier movie, and throw the Mummy title on it.” And the similarities end there. The same characters, two of the same actors (yes, only two. Brendan and the idiot brother of the girl. Everyone else is either new or replaced.)

Oh yeah, and apparently everyone in this movie is Superman. People got dragged along the ground and against moving gears and all that, and not only did they not get injured, their clothes weren’t even ripped. Who the hell gets dragged along a road without ripped clothes or scratches? They should have been ground up like beef! Ground beef!

The acting. Oh dear lord, the acting. I’ve seen third grade drama plays with higher quality acting. The best actor in the movie, easily Brendan Frasier, I would only rate as satisfactory. Everyone else was forced, stale, and insincere. Jet Li was his usual awesome self, but since for the vast majority of the movie, he was a walking statue, he doesn’t count.

And of course, the mandatory love story. Aside from both actors being truly woeful, there was no chemistry whatsoever. Plus, the way they fell for each other was just pathetic. Totally unbelievable, and the bad acting just made it worse. Every line they uttered just made me groan and turn away.

The bad guy, Jet Li, like I said before, is a walking statue. You know, terra cotta warrior style. He can shoot fireballs and make ice stab people, for some reason. Oh, and later, he can turn into a three headed dragon and some cat/ape thing. None of this has any explanation or logical reasoning.

I can’t really fault the special effects, but I’m not about to go out and sing their praises, either.

Overall, I hated this movie, and I thoroughly recommend, if you’re going to see it, bring matches. And flammable liquids. If you can’t set the cinema on fire, at least you can set yourself on fire. Perhaps the searing agony and the stink of charred flesh will take your mind off of the enormous pile of steaming shit that is The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor.

Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance (GC)

September 20, 2008 at 8:12 pm | In Games, Reviews | Leave a Comment
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Another game I haven’t quite finished, but I’ve played enough to get a decent opinion of.

First of all, I’m a big fan of the Fire Emblem games. The two for Gameboy Advance, Blazing Sword and Sacred Stones, were two of my favourite games. Path of Radiance doesn’t really change much, but in Fire Emblem’s case, that’s usually a good thing.

I was wondering how they’d handle the graphics transition, going from Gameboy to Gamecube. Their art is largely Anime/Mange style, and largely 2D. Not something that would go down well on the cube. They solved this by using 3D graphics for the battle sequences and traditional 2D for dialogue/story scenes. The 3D graphics, while not the worst things I’ve ever seen, were enough to make me groan when I first saw them. The whole visual feel of the game was not only lost, but completely decimated. Woeful, truly woeful. The story scenes are the only thing that save it from being a complete graphical write-off. They also do some animated cutscenes, which are quite impressively done, combined with some mediocre voice acting, but they’re few and far between. Overall, I actually prefer the graphics on the handheld systems.

The story is much the same as any of the others. Nothing original, but it’s a tried and true formula for them. I have no complaints. You don’t play Fire Emblem for originality. Maybe one day they’ll make it more open ended, but I doubt it.

The gameplay, too, is much the same. My main complaint here is in the saving feature. Without being able to save during a battle, it’s possible to get all the way to the end of said battle, then have your favourite unit killed by a bunch of über strong reinforcements that you had no idea were coming. Then you have to start the whole battle again. Not cool.

The sound effects and music are an improvement on the handheld versions (thank goodness) but still not impressive. Still, they’re not so terrible that I want to pour acid into my ears to drown it out. Or even mute it, if I wanted to be really radical.

Also, either my luck is getting worse, or level increases are even more likely to provide you with very little in the way of stat increases. That pissed me off. I’m used to having super-mega units, not mediocre wimps that I have to keep running to avoid being killed. 

That’s really my main complaint. All your units are so wimpy, you have to work really hard just to keep them all alive. It’s not that the battles are hard. They’d be painfully easy if you weren’t worried about people dying. But people do die, very very easily, and that ruins the experience for me. 

So far, 7/10. It’s really just the Fire Emblem formula that keeps it alive.

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed (Wii)

September 20, 2008 at 7:54 pm | In Games, Reviews | Leave a Comment
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I was very excited about this. A whole game dedicated to owning the crap out of people with the force. Heck yes. Well, it does exactly as it promises. And not much else. I haven’t finished it yet, but I’m getting pretty close.

The graphics are, well, pathetic, really. I know the Wii isn’t the most powerful console, but the graphics are comparable to the PS2, which is really quite disappointing. They’re not enough to ruin the game though.

There’s a fair bit of voice acting, which I like. None of it is by the real Star Wars actors, but the replacements are fairly good. Not brilliant, but by normal gaming standards, not too bad at all.

The controls I like. They’ve made good use of the unique capabilities of the Wii controller and nunchuck, and limited buttons. They’re not always as responsive as they should be, and sometimes they ignore my input completely, but overall, I’d say they’ve done fairly well.

The storyline is VERY linear. No variation, no options, no nothing. I dunno if it changes between now and the end, but I doubt it. I guess since it’s supposed to tell the story of Darth Vader’s secret apprentice, between episodes III and IV, they have to, but still. I’d like some options.

You can customise your outfit, the colour and hilt of your lightsaber, and your force powers (all from fairly limited sets, and you have to unlock them all first) but it certainly is better than looking the same all the way through. There are many lightsaber colour options, but in game they all end up looking white when the action starts. The force powers are cool, but there are only a few base ones (push, grip, lighting and choke) that you can apply in combos and various ways. But, can you ever really get tired of throwing giant crates at a group of helpless stormtroopers?

The environments are fairly destructible. There’s not much you can’t use the force to throw at someone. Or, just the wall, if you feel that way inclined. The levels are as linear as the storyline though, and there’s pretty much only ever one path through.

The enemies are rarely challenging, which makes sense, being an all powerful sith, but they spice it up with some tougher opponents, like an AT-ST (the walking machines from episode VI), that require more creativity and skill to defeat. Also, I ran into some stormtroopers with jetpacks that just refused to die. I force lightning-ed them, I threw massive rocks at them, I threw them into the ground, I choked them, I chopped them up, and they just would not die. I was very angry.

Aside from that, the game is heaps of fun. It’s great to just walk through a level, confident in the knowledge that the next poor soul who you come across is going to die in one of many painful, force-induced ways. Personally, I can’t get enough of force lightning. ZAAAAAAAP!

So, uh, yeah. 7.5/10 is my current score for it.

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